We couldn’t fly out until Thursday night, because Benton had school…and I would not fly alone. Our flight was at 7:50pm. At 4:00 flights were canceled.
I started calling. I started looking. By the time the airlines called back I had my route figured out. Told her to make the changes. We would fly to ABQ instead of Durango. Almost 25 hours late. But, we are there.
Alicia was in full boss mode. Mom was sitting in the corner and said Alicia told her to sit down. Everything in full chaos. 52 opinions, and ideas…Alicia about to explode. So, I of course came in to save the day. I know she’s shaking her head right now saying YEAH RIGHT!!! But, I did save the day. Like it or not.
Her, and Mother…I can make them so mad at me they forget everything else. It’s an art, and I have it perfected. Trey used to say don’t let it drag on…get the explosion over with quick, so we can all be friends. Alicia and I both suffer from MAJOR anxiety. We get stuck in our heads BAD. I know the way to get her out of hers…by picking on her…endlessly. Let her get mad at me, everything else is fine. It’s a rule.
Get together. Get mad & cry.
That happens. And we are best friends. It doesn’t happen…stand back.
We are dead tired. But, there. We meet my sister at rehearsal and set up that night at 5. I’m not needed…except to make her mad. She’s figured everything out. She don’t need no help, and she would let you know. So, I decide there are too many tables. I won’t drop it…we need to take tables out. Over and over and over. She has her little melt down. Calls me very nice names, cries, and tells me to just leave. We are good. She got it out.
Alicia has changed. Sistergirl of yesteryear didn’t care…went along with anything to make everyone happy. Didn’t matter, anything to not ripple the water. but, inside she was a mess. An unstable pressure cooker waiting to blow. Any second. We hold everything in until it reaches catastrophic levels. So, being the nice brother that I am….I pop that balloon before it gets too bIg. Aren’t I nice???
Except. If you know Alicia…you also know she’s ….. Alicia. A mess. Crazy, Loud, Outspoken, says what she wants…when she wants. No filter. Ever. It comes out quicker than she thinks it.
Best example I can remember CLEARLY…the first night we met Tim’s new Wife, our new ‘stepmom’. We were getting the whole I don’t want to be your mom, I want to be your ‘friend’ speech. Alicia was sassy pants back then too. I don’t know where this came from…we hadn’t even been told he had gotten married, we were clueless about anything going on. I remember we were both scared to be away from mom…back in vanderwagon, our old house, with this new lady that had totally taken over. We were just like WHAT is going on?
Sherry was telling Alicia how pretty she was, and they could be best friends. Sistergirl was not amused. She looked her straight in the face, she wasn’t even in kindergarten yet…and said matter of factly ‘you ain’t gonna be my friend. You’re a $&)@?’
It wasn’t just sherry, or other step parents…basically everyone gets the wrath of Alicia.
But, all that’s changed…at least for now.
Alicia and I have been close for awhile. There are things I know that ain’t nobody know…well maybe somebody know, but in my mind they don’t. Years and years ago I was freaked out she might marry. And I didn’t like the thought. At all. It was hard having Sistergirl grow up. It was a lot to see. When she broke up with the bastard I was so happy. So was Trey. But he wanted her to meet someone as bad as I did. We always wondered if she ever would.
Then my stroke in 2020. I knew my sister was there. I felt okay when she was there…she was always there at night. Granted I thought we were in New Orleans for medical tests…and she would go out for food and never remember to being any back for me. She was there through all my tests, through all the scary times. She was there when the nurse came in one night to change something…I was terrified. I would not let her leave, I did not want to be alone. I wouldn’t let go of her hand. The nurse told her to turn around.
It was time to change my catheter. I didn’t care. I was terrified, anytime I was alone everything got mixed up. Everything made sense when she was there. It was same ol’ Sistergirl. Laughing to herself…watching golden girls, not even paying attention to me. Just being there. Tickling my feet. Picking on me. I knew everything was right.
The day she left I was in the middle of a hallucination, and mad because she was leaving. I couldn’t move…and I was mad she was leaving. Everything wasn’t going to make sense anymore. I was pissed.
I think that’s when I decided my mom being there was a total hallucination - because if Alicia left so would have she.
I don’t remember talking to Alicia after that…until I called her about Trey. Ans she asked if she needed to come out. I didn’t know or understand what was going on. So I didn’t know. I didn’t know anything.
Days later she was the first person I called, or talked to the morning Trey passed. I called her before waking up mom. I didn’t know what to do. It was all becoming so real, so fast.
Years before…Alicia came to town for awhile and got to know Trey very well. We got her dressed up to the nines and went out to go dancing. She had on some kinda hooker heels. We walked into the club, and true to Alicia…she walked in, and fell flat on her face. Right in front of everyone.
I remember Trey cooking us dinner at his apartment. And he brought out appetizers…toast points with baked tomatoes and cheese….Alicia was like 😳… her and vegetables don’t get along. The whole meal she was looking at everything 👀wondering if she could eat it. Trey always liked pushing her limits.
They always really liked one another. That made this wedding even harder. Just knowing Trey always wanted to see her happy. He always said we would both have to give her away. More like we would both have to push her down the aisle, or drag her.
So…my sister always ALWAYS said that at her wedding she would be having Taco Bell. Almost Everytime we would pass a Taco Bell…Trey would say ‘mmmmmm. Wedding food’ facetiously.
Alicia did not have Taco Bell after all. But, just remembering Trey always making fun of her snd Taco Bell - we went to get her a Taco Bell gift card.
Right before it was time to walk down the aisle I gave her a present. Not the most meaningful gift ever…but, one that had a LOT of memories tied to it. Probably not the best time to give it…because I’m an emotional mess. But I did…and she laughed. And true to Alicia immediately asked ‘HOW MUCH IS IT???’
And then…the doors opened
Why are the doors open? I thought we had a minute snd a half once the music started????
We stood there like morons. Just standing there like ummmm what do we do? I was laughing, crying, and not sure what to do. So we walk? Do we stay? Alicia was asking me ‘Thomas where do I carry my bouquet? Her or here? Or what?’ I just remember saying Alicia just carry it. We look like idiots. And then we started walking.
Thomas walk slower…how slow do you want me to walk? Good lord Kelcy is making me deaf…Alicia don’t pull on me…I’m sorry, do you want to hold on to me?…good lord no. Just hold me up.
The whole time I can’t tell whether I’m laughing or crying. Is this really happening? Good lord…I’m wearing a T-shirt. Oh God…people are looking at me. Keep your head down. Don’t look at anyone. Don’t get distracted. Look at the ground. It was a mess. I didn’t know where to stop, nothing.
All I knew was my mom wasn’t sitting where we had practiced, or next to the seat I had checked and made sure was stable. I think I said to Alicia ‘Dammit your mother sat in the wrong place’ Alicia said Thomas it’s fine…she’s over there’. But. It bothered me. I was about to stop the wedding because I had checked the right seat and it was okay to sit in. Now what if the left seat fell back, or moved…I’d be flat on my ass. I was concerned.
And then I realized the minister was looking at me. ‘WHAT HE SAY ALICIA???’
Give me Away….
‘I DO…HERE take her!’
My mind went totally blank. I was going to give Joe a stack of 1 dollar bills as her dowry…and tell him no exchanges, or returns.
I was going to ask my mom to come up…and tell him congrats … it’s BOGO time!!! Buy one Get one Free.
But no. I just said ‘here take her‘. And then went to my WRONG seat and told my mother….your sitting on the wrong side.
I have no idea what happened after that.
I know it was a beautiful reception, it was 100% Alicia. Not all about her…in any way. Food, Friends, Family…in a barn community hall style dancing. With too many tables.
and then Aunt Anita was wout on the dance floor booty dancing…Anna and Benton apparently doing some interpretive dance number, and just a big loud family mess.
And then like all family functions everyone grabbed what they could and cleaned up.
Well, not me. I sat out on the porch, and waited.
I don’t know when the last time I was at a big family function such as that. I guess Christmas 2019, but my mind was elsewhere then. Before that would have been Grandma Roberts at the community hall…and that was certainly nothing like the Roberts family get togethers.
This was just a good time…even though I didn’t even see half the family …they were there, I just didn’t see them.
All in all it was very Sistergirl…and very much like her rude self, I didn’t even get to say goodbye. She refused to leave the house to tell me goodbye.
Some things never change.
Pop that balloon before it over inflates!!!